Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Circumstances and Excuses

Don't allow circumstances to limit the impact of your life!
Circumstances are a part of life. They are the conditions that affect how someone reacts to a particular situation. That's, in part, what the Encarta Dictonary defines them as. Let's call them what they truly are... excuses!
We so often complain about where we are in life. We want more. More time with the family, more money, a bigger house, a nicer car, ___________ (insert your "more" here!). However, there's always a but, a circumstance, an excuse. I'm not smart enough, I'm not pretty enough, I come from a poor background, I don't live in the right neighborhood, I don't know any better, I can't... you're right!
I've learned something lately that I believe is very true. If you think you can't, you're right! If you think you can, you're right!
You, and only you, have the ability and power to change your circumstances. It all comes down to whether you want to make that change. Most people don't. They find comfort in complaining. And, why not? People give complainers the attention they desire. Now don't get me wrong, not everyone is looking for the attention. Many are scared to death of failure.
Most view failure as an ugly word, but those who succeed at reaching their dreams understand the power of failure. Did you know that Walt Disney failed at securing a loan for Disney World more than 300 times? Or, that Donald Trump was unable to repay $9.2 billion in debt as he struggled in business during the early 1990s?
I recently read, "that a low point came when he (Trump) passed a beggar on the street and realized the beggar was worth $9.2 billion more than he was." Talk about circumstances! But, Donald Trump, Walt Disney, Thomas Edison, Abraham Lincoln and so many more understood that learning and wisdom come from failure. They didn't just say, "I'm not smart enough, I'm not pretty enough, I can't."
Here's the bottom line. Our Creator would not allow us to dream as big as we do if we didn't have the ability to achieve those dreams! I don't think that point can be argued, do you?
It's okay to accept where you're at, but if you want to change, if you want better, YOU have to move and make the effort. Learn from your failures and keep moving forward. No one ever achieved their dreams by quitting.

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Legacy

My son, the oldest of my two children, will celebrate his second birthday tomorrow. Being a father is the most amazing and yet scariest experience of my life to date. It takes much more than just being present, just being visible, to be a Dad. It takes interaction. More importantly, it takes genuine effort.
I believe anyone can be in the same room with a child and call it parenting... I call that babysitting. I further believe that most parents are just too lazy to play, to teach, to raise a child that will be better than they are.
When put beside my wife, I have no doubt I am the image of what I have just described. She's incredible! The hardest working wife/mother I have ever seen. Odd enough, she tells me that she sometimes feels guilty that she's not doing enough for our children. That couldn't be further from reality. For instance, today, she has loaded up our son and our six week old daughter to take them to play at a "sprayground." Did I mention she's by herself... talk about SuperMom!
I witnessed an incredible moment the other day. She was sitting in the floor with our son helping him put together an alphabet puzzle. Help may not be the right word... she was teaching, encouraging, engaging! I was first impressed with how smart my son was, but then I was more impressed that my wife was still making the effort this late in the day. She had been with the two kids all day, had prepared dinner, done laundry... you get the point. A lesser person would have checked out at this point. I know she was exhausted, that's the life of a stay-at-home mom with a toddler and an infant, but she recognizes that her time with our children is precious, and you can't get back those moments that have passed.
Our children are our legacy. They are the image of us when we are no longer around. They pass our values and beliefs on to their children and their children and so on. Personally, I don't want to create a legacy of laziness. I don't want a legacy that lacks values, morals, hard work, fun, laughter, etc. I want my children, when they are parents, to be better than I am... only there's a catch. My children will have to work at being a parent. They will have to work at loving more, laughing more, being more silly, teaching more, sharing more... the list goes on. With the example of their mother, they'll be alright!
I am silly with my children. They give me an excuse to be a kid again... I don't want to be their best friend though, I want to be their father! I believe they will come to me as a father before they will go to their "best friend." This is my desire, and I know it will take a lot of work. And, the work will payoff in the legacy that I am building. All this legacy talk may sound selfish, but I'm proud to be a father, and I understand not only the privilege, but the responsibility that my Heavenly Father has given me as a parent. I'm pretty sure He desires to leave a lasting legacy as well.
I am not perfect. I just want to be the best I can for my family. And so, my journey continues. I will continue to learn from my wife, learn from my children, and grow as a father and husband. I believe we all should look for opportunities to grow as a person. My family has given me that endless opportunity.
Take hold of these opportunities yourself, and leave a legacy that you can be proud of.